Last year, the new chief petty officer inductees found out about their selection yesterday. I had known before the results came out that I wasn't meant to be a chief last year. You can read about my thoughts from then by clicking on this link.
But ironically, this year, I feel like I have a shot, so obviously I am feeling rather anxious right now. I try not to be. I know that this is in God's hands, and I will either make it or not, depending if He wants me to. That's actually a pretty freeing place to be. No board member seeing my record can counter what God wants to happen. And I can't either. I did my part. I took the test, I scored well enough to be board eligible, and now I wait...and wait...and wait.
My impatience is a symptom of my issues with trusting God. Two weeks ago, I was fine with God making the decision and the results coming out however they came out. Now, however, I just want to find out, and of course I hope I am one of the blessed ones that get selected.
I must, however, focus on God right now. Only He has the final authority on me making chief. "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" Jesus asked that in the book of Luke (NIV). I now ask myself, can I add one thing to the chief selection board results by worrying? No, of course not. God knows that I want to be a chief, and when He has decided that I am ready, he will make me one...well, He'll undoubtedly have some help from some current chiefs as well!
You have a good attitude about it, and I commend you for continually surrendering it the LORD. I know how hard that is for you... and me! It frustrates me that I KNOW that the LORD has determined my steps, has numbered my days, and ordained my relationship wiht Him, and yet I still doubt, I still try to control. Makes my appreciation of His grace, and long suffering all the more central to my life. In the end all we can do is surrender our doubt. You are doing that!
You will look great in Khaki my friend!
You have the right attitude, bro. AND you are wrestling with THE original sin: unbelief. It was not the fruit, it was failure to believe God and follow the serpent that got Adam and Eve (and the rest of us) in trouble. Ever since, unbelief--lack of faith has been mankind's downfall with God, our own family and friends and between nations.
You both have made my day. I read your comments earlier but just now have the ample time to think through a response. Truly, I am blessed to have friends like the both of you. I am doing the best I can to bring God glory despite my random impatience, and having folks like you guys helping me is a good thing. Thank you both!
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